7:30 a.m. I can’t get out of bed. My body physically rejects parting from the flannel sheets. Too. warm. and. cozy. to. move. 8 a.m. Step out of bed, left foot first. Still hurts. Something’s gotta be broken or bent or something in there. On account of it was stepped on. By a stiletto. AlmostContinue reading “Diary of a hypochondriac, day 10066”
Tag Archives: hypochondria
He knows me too well
Me, as I’m looking at our options for Netflix instant viewing on the Wii: “Oh, hey, they have 1,000 Ways to Die on here.” Roommate: “You don’t need to watch that.” Me: “But I’m getting better..” Roommate: “You are. And that’s exactly why we’re not gonna watch it.”
Top 10, take two
To kick off blog birthday week, my suggestions this week are a bit on the self-promotion side. OK, they’re all the way on the self-promotion side. I can’t lie to you guys. This week my blog turns two. Hopefully, unlike I’ve heard it is with kids, this two-year-old won’t have anything remotely close to terrible.Continue reading “Top 10, take two”
The Girl Who Cried Appendicitis
An appendix looks very similar to a small dog’s tail. And it’s a completely useless organ that we haven’t needed since we were cave-people. And every so often, it swells up and causes the worst pain you’ll ever feel, after which a nice lady will tell you it needs to come out. And then aContinue reading “The Girl Who Cried Appendicitis”
Property owner
No, I didn’t buy a house. But I do own two pieces of land. Islands, in fact. They’re kind of close together, but most of the time they’re moving and they’re farther apart. Oh, and they have the same name – Bone Island. Before you get your mind all in the gutter, a bone islandContinue reading “Property owner”