Hurry up and wait

There are some harsh realities that come with putting yourself out there into the dating scene (do we call it that? Is it The Game? No, that’s a rapper..).

You have to be patient, I’m told, which is funny because I’ve been patient for quite some time. Long enough that I should win the Most Patient Award by whoever gives shit like that out. Kindergarten classes maybe?

I’m trying that whole online thing, remember? And it took me about 39.21 hours from signing up for “free” to break down and give the Internet money to help find me love.

And this shit’s brutal.

So maybe the first couple nights I was a little slutty with the winking (it’s a feature where you basically send people a “wink” whose profile you liked). Aaaaaand nothing has come of it.

Oh, there was that one “No thanks” from someone, so that was cool…

It also tells you how many people have looked at your profile. Now, I’m not good at math, but I can tell you that my ratio thus far of views to responses is a bit on the unfortunate side.

Yes, I know, be patient. Blah blah blah.

They send you new “matches” every morning, but that just means there are like 4 things on your profile that are the same as mine and you don’t smoke either. SOULMATES.

I’m trying not to be pessimistic, kids. Really I am. But I’ve waited a long while. Long enough to stop thinking about waiting, forget about waiting, get on with my life, and oh, wait, there it is again…start waiting again.

It’s frustrating. Because I’m awesome. I’m also happy, 95.4 percent of the time, with where I am and what I’m doing and what I’ve got. Some of the rest of the 4.6 percent is made up by those 20 MG I take a day that give me heartburn if I forget to eat breakfast….but there’s about 1 percent missing.

I’d like to find the 1 percent. Or maybe just somebody to hold hands with at the movies.

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9 thoughts on “Hurry up and wait

  1. onceamonth4 says:

    You have NO idea how much I relate to this post! You basically summed up my experience with online dating (eHarmony, Match, yadda yadda). I am perpetually single. I am TIRED of “being patient”. Where the heck do I meet guys? Ugh, it’s so frustrating.

    All of my girlfriends are partnered up (you can check out our blog http://www.onceamonth4ladies.com) and so I can offer the single perspective on our website. Hooray for me. Guess what I am doing in November…speed dating. Yeap. Never thought I would say that (or write that, in this case). I will definitely be writing about my experience on our site, so be sure to check it out mid to end of November.

    Thanks for this post. We can commiserate together 🙂

    • Laura says:

      Hey Tosha,
      Thanks for the comment and reblog! I’m glad to know I have someone to commiserate with and can’t wait to read your post about speed dating! You’re a brave soldier! I would be so scared!

      Interested to hear how it goes. Keep me updated!

  2. onceamonth4 says:

    Reblogged this on Once a Month and commented:
    Oh, dating…
    I don’t care what people say; dating is not fun. Online dating is one step below ‘not fun’.

    “Be patient”…words I, and I am sure many of you single ladies out there, have heard time and time again. A big thanks to “On account of…” for posting this rant about online dating.

  3. Beth says:

    I tried eHarmony–colossal fail. I swore off online dating and then a coworker (with the best of intentions, I might add) talked me into trying ChristianMingle (because, as she put it, “Your faith is important to you and you’d meet like-minded people”)–also a colossal fail. Patience has never been one of my finer virtues and long-term singleness is not helping to develop it either… It’s nice to know there are more of us in the trenches together!

  4. justmylines says:

    I did online dating on and off for about 2 years before meeting my ex from one of the sites. Obviously, it didn’t work out but we did date for almost a year. Hang in there! Hope it gets better!

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