Category Archives: Quotable

Well, I was six. Once.

by

0

This week in Sunday school it was kind of a mad house. Six kids. Five of them were boys. Two of them were age 3. All of them had their levels cranked to 11.

When I finally got them to sit down and listen to the story, it calmed down a bit. There was question asking and hand-raising and Jackson, age 6, asked his fellow miscreants to raise their hands if they were 6 years old as well.

Naturally, I raised my hand.

Jackson: Miss Laura, you’re not six!
Me: Yeah huh! I am.
Jackson: You’re not!
Me: Then how old am I?
Jackson: Sixteen!
Me: Oh, yeah. I forgot.
Will, also age 6, whom I babysat for last week and I’ve already played this game with: No you’re not, you’re 27!

Dammit. Cover’s been blown.

Squirrel…dry cleaner…same thing

by

0

My parents are not making it easy on themselves when it comes to keeping them out of the blog. Everything will be fine and dandy and uneventful and then we go out to dinner with them and I wish I had it on video.

Since I don’t, you’ll have to settle for a partial transcript of part of our evening the other night. Scene: Me, Rachel, Mom and Dad at dinner at a Chinese restaurant near their house. We are each talking about our day and about work and Rachel is a few minutes into a story about her job when Mom speaks up.

Mom, looking across the restaurant while Rachel is still talking: “Is that my dry cleaner?”
Dad, looking too: “Did you pick up my suit?”
Rachel, looking at me because she’s just realized I’m the only one really paying attention: “Anyway, Laura…”

It’s a lot like this with them sometimes:

Bourbon Boys Teaser 2

by

0

I promise you will see the full story – with photos soon. In fact, I can safely say you’ll see it within the next 24 hours.

But for now, another couple little tidbits to tide you over.

Beanden: Hot and Spicy Cheez-its? We’ll be fartin’ fire and breathin’ whiskey.

Moments earlier: “I’m drinking before Taco Bell is open. That’s not healthy.”

Bourbon Boys Teaser

by

0

To get you excited nervous ready to hear about the Bourbon Boys Adventure 2K11, here’s a quote from the day that I will simply attribute to Anonymous. And you’ll see why.

Tour guy: And this is where we bring the barrels next. We call it the Dump Station.
Anonymous gentleman in our group:That’s where I need to go right now is the Dump Station.

Pretty sure that name didn’t appear in the Bible but bonus points for creativity

by

0

I’ve signed up to help teach four- and five-year-old Sunday School because I’m a glutton for punishment I enjoyed helping Rachel out when she was teaching last year and the one week I’ve attended so far did not disappoint.

The lady that’s doing most of the teaching (I’m there for cat-herding and craft assistance) is the sweetest woman you’ll ever meet and she has a grandson in the class. Her other grandson, Wyatt, apparently came to the class last week, even though he’s 3.

That age is big on repetition so for Sunday School the past two weeks they’ve learned the story about Abraham and Sarah.

Or they’re supposed to.

Because apparently, last week, after the lesson when the teacher asked the class what Abraham’s wife’s name was (after it had been repeated multiple times) Wyatt called out confidently: “LADY GAGA.”

It’s gonna be a fun year…

You have to admit, it’s a better name

by

1

On the last night we were in London, we were talking about the differences between America and England. After a couple lessons in speaking the language, we started talking about the important stuff.

Me: “You guys have snuggies?”
Seb and Emma: “What’s a snuggie?”
Me: “You know, those blankets with sleeves.”
Seb: “Oh those. We call them slankets. Or bleeves.”

Important lessons at a young age

by

0

While watching “How To Look Good Naked” in England – where at the end of the show you usually see someone naked (from the back, it’s not too crazy), we listened to Alistair’s reactions to the lady they were showing.

Alistair, 6: Ooh! Woo! Underwear!
(Lady on the show shows herself naked from the back)
Guy on TV: Brilliant!
Allyson: Alistair, do you say brilliant?
Alistair: Only when I see her naked!